I believe people come into your life for a reason. This week I attended the Lester-Allen wedding in Columbus, Ohio. As the ceremony came to a close, we read 1 Corinthians 13:4-7:
"Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always preserves."
As I turned my head away from my brother in hopes that he wouldn't see me tear up I thought to myself: "Is there really a perfect love?"
No. While every relationship, in a perfect world, should meet the above criteria...they don't. That would be impossible.
In this blog I will discuss the parts that I believe from past experiences, and from what I have observed to be most important and true:
1. Love is patient
2. It keeps no record of wrongs.
3. It rejoices with the truth...always protects, always trusts, always hopes, and always preserves.
Love is patient, but how? Patience is waiting. Not passively waiting. That is laziness. But to keep going when the going is hard and slow-that is patience.
Patience is beautiful when mature enough to fully comprehend its' true meaning. Nothing in life, especially relationships, come easy.
I was surrounded by relationships this week...some fought more than others, but when it came down to it, there was deep admiration for each other. I hope one day I will be in a relationship where regardless of what we do to each other we will ALWAYS share one thing in common. Unconditional love.
How does love keep no record of wrongs? It's simple...when you deeply care for someone you don't hold onto the mistakes they have made. No one is perfect. It is the hard times that make the good times more meaningful.
For example, my first "real" love, is the prime example of not holding record of wrongs. I don't share this with many people, but he is the root to many of my insecurities. Things were great at first. He made me happy, and I was ecstatic that someone else made me feel like I was worth it. A few months into dating I went on a date with him, and my best friend came along. Strangely the whole night he paid more attention to my friend than me...the next day he broke up with me and started to date my friend a week later. I can't even describe how hurt I was. They only lasted for two weeks, but of course he came back to me. I forgave him. Afterwards for six months consistently he made my life hell. The things he would say to me I didn't think I could ever forgive him for, but I did.
One example that really stuck out to me was one day we were talking about physical appearances, he knew I was insecure about my appearance, but he asked me: "On a scale of 1 to 10, how would you rate yourself?" Shocked by this question, I honestly answered him saying, "I don't know...not very high. Maybe a 5?"
You know what he said to me?
"Wrong. I would rate you a 3...at the highest."
It was that sort of stuff I went through every day. Never EVER, will I leave myself being that vulnerable again. The hurt I felt still gets to me today from time to time.
Now it truthfully was a question of his maturity, but boys will be boys. We had a falling out over the summer as every highschool relationship endures one point or another. He transferred schools, so it wasn't even possible for us to try dating again, but he begged for my companionship still...
I said yes, regardless of the hurt I felt, I can't hold grudges against those who I cared for.
And you know what? I am glad I forgave him. We are great friends now, and he has apologized to me several times. He has gone through a few girlfriends since me, and from his words he has said that ours was the most influential to him. When I need him to give me male advice, or a shoulder to cry on he has reached up and above the limits to help me out.
Loving someone also means to not only hope for the best, but to KNOW that the best is only yet to come.